~ UnDeR mY sKiN ~

to wax or not to wax... that is the question... www.mystiqc.blogspot.com

~ I quit! ... well i will... soon... ~

i feel well... kinda numb. i feel like i dun have an opinion bout anything - which can't be entirely true bcuz i always have an opinion bout everything. somehow... i've just gone numb. times like these... i feel like just throwing in the towel and floating along with the current of the tides of life. take me wherever, do wateva u want with me... i'm just not too bothered right now.

i'm sick of the pple around me right at this moment... these arse-kissers and backstabbers and hypocrites in the office... i'm sick of being immersed in an environment where so much ugliness of the human character thrives. they won't break my spirit... but i do not wanna stay here too long less i become indifferent to the unethical shit that happens here.

i'm just a little sick of the world right at this moment. i feel like i wanna be alone but i dun wanna be lonely. i wanna talk to pple but i'm too weary to carry the world and listen to situations that are beyond my control even if i wanted to help. i'm too tired to take on the world oh fuck!

the old fart's secretary just came and informed me that "Ur tickets are confirmed." "what tickets?" I ask. "Ur tickets to japan..." my eyes open wide in absolute disbelief. "my tickets to japan?!?! wat tickets?!?! who says i'm going to japan?!?!" "Ur flight's tomoro nite... haven't u been informed yet?"

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO shit. i hate my frigging boss. and this just reminded me one of the reasons WHY. this is a 4 day trip, and he goes and makes bookings for my tickets without even informing me, just assuming that i'll go! yes i guess i shd be flattered that he feels the need to bring me along for this biz trip but But BUT! honest to god i dun wanna go... this trip will KILL me. spending day and nite in the company of old fart and his useless son will KILL ME I SWEAR. pls god or whoever it is up there pls gimme some divine intervention and make it NOT happen! i noe u can MAKE IT NOT HAPPEN! PLS!

posted by: livingde8ddoll at February 28, 2005 16:33 | link | comments (1) |

Hey guys

I need a favour. My neighbour has a puppy he's giving away. It's a Dachshund and it's great with kids. He's giving it away because his silly wife says the dog 'stares' at her, and that gives her the 'heebie jeebies'.

If you're interested (ummm u would need to be living in Singapore ya) , or know someone who is, let me know. Here's a picture of the dog. Pls help, he's really cute!

posted by: darkscarlette at February 25, 2005 13:34 | link | comments (3) |

~ Fatal attraction ~

there are many differnet definitions of LOVE. yes, love. let's see:

- Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.

- nature's way of tricking people into reproducing

- A terrible, horrible infectious disease of the mind, that is falsely portrayed as wonderful by most ignorant individuals. It weakens one, allowing them to be easily manipulated, and eventually leads to nothing but pain and suffering.

- A temporary insanity curable by marriage.

- A disease that eventually results in suicide or children. Children can also result in suicide. Love can be treated with alcohol which is a wonderful substance that numbs you to any emotions what-so-ever. Also see bullshit or stupidity.

ahahahahahah all true so true! but look here at this last one... it says...

- love can be dangerous...if handled improperly.

ahhh... love, when it turns spiteful, becomes something called Fatal Attraction. Have u watched it? cuz i haven't. But i have a pretty good idea wat it's bout.

Kiss and tell guys are not cool. (it's ok for girls to do it tho hur hur). it is also not cool to do things to ruin his/her life permanently out of spite. if u claim u truly love someone, u'd want that person to be happy. the ultimate kind of love is releasing the person to let him/her be happy, even if it means not being with u. i liken holding on to someone by way of emotional manipulation to a master stringing his puppet along. it is also the same as when u nasi kangkang someone (nasi kangkang refers to a malay black magic ritual involving the use of freshly steamed rice...what u do is u squat over that pot of freshly steamed rice, let the vapour rise and condensate on ur genitals, and let the condensation fall back into the rice. mmmm feed that rice to the person u wanna nasi kangkang and he/she will be totally MINDLESSLY devoted to u... much like a zombie without a mind of his own). does dat really bring u true happiness?

Fatal attraction (background music: psycho *shwing shwing shwing shwing*).

posted by: livingde8ddoll at February 24, 2005 17:13 | link | comments (7) |

~ i have come to the conclusion... ~

that hangovers are bad for me mainly becuz:

#1 - i am trying to lose that bit of weight and having a hangover makes me very hungry and if i dun put anything in that tummy i'll feel even sicker and so i end up eating more than i allow myself to.

#2 - a bad hangover often leaves me feeling too weak and tired to run the 4.5km i have to run in order to shed the kilos faster.

as shrub might noe, i am trying desperately to develop an eating disorder but i am failing miserably bcuz i can't convince myself that i really wanna be all skinny and anorexic cuz i really dun think that's attractive at all. now if only i didn't have a brain... if only i was an airhead who thinks of nothing but starving myself in the hopes of getting that frail half-alive always hungry look.

posted by: darkscarlette at February 23, 2005 14:07 | link | comments (3) |

~ i came to work so stoned today. ~

i have not come to work so stoned in the middle of the week in a long time. but last nite was wicked! it was such a last min impromptu thing cuz a fren's leaving for australia so we all decided to go down and party before he leaves tomoro. we got to the club at midnite and partied till 4am woot! Fender reluctantly went on stage and did Last Kiss by Pearl Jam - and it was so farnee cuz he used to have stage fright and though he's much more confident now, he was still so nervous. i've no frigging idea why he had his eyes shut like almost the entire first half of the song it was hilarious but he managed to calm down some during the second half so that was ok. all in all it was alright really, and a good experience for him - at least he didn't slur like a certain someone i noe does when drunk. and when he finished and came back down, he held my hands and his fingers were icy cold. i call him a Gan Cheong Spider Panic Master - in this area he's totally his dad's son hehe.

posted by: darkscarlette at February 23, 2005 13:38 | link | comments |

~ the fabric of life ~

isn't it weird how sometimes i've to fight so hard to remember cuz i'm so afraid of forgetting... and yet at other times, there's nothing i'd wish more than to forget.

the girl i am today is a result of all the things i've lived thru. If i neva tasted coke, i wldn't miss it cuz i wldn't noe that it tasted sweeter than water. if i'd neva got into so many fights at 15, i'd neva noe how fun it was to be a right bitch and rough it out like the guys do. likewise, in my life, if i'd neva seen and done some of the things i did, i might be more contented with whateva i have... neva knowing there was more out there that i would love.

i have taken so many bites out of the forbidden apple. and i admit it's left me feeling somewhat hollow and discontented at times. but i'll rather have my eyes open than be a blind man.

life is too fragile to let the pple who matter pass u by. the moment is now, and then it's gone. 

but the fabric of reality remains unchanged nonetheless... and yes it's true after all... deleting a memory does no more than deleting a picture would erase the event photographed.

posted by: psyche at February 21, 2005 10:59 | link | comments (3) |

~ i just had to rip this off and post it here ~

Came across this comment by ChefNeal on Jackal's blog, i thot it's absolutely brilliantly put bcuz those few words appear so simple but carry so much meaning!

True friends are those who really know you but love you anyway.
~ Edna Buchanan

yup...

posted by: livingde8ddoll at February 19, 2005 11:40 | link | comments (1) |

~ Where's ur manners?! ~

last nite, when my zippo got stolen, there was quite a commotion and some pple tried to help find it but of cuz it couldn't be found bcuz it hadn't just dropped onto the floor - it had been stolen and the thief had left. anyways, my point is... shrub got mad. do NOT mess with my sista when she's mad... and buzzed nuh uh.

this girl whom we hardly knew came over to apologize for the 'fren' that stole the zippo. we couldn't for the life of us understand WHY cuz it was really none of her business, she didn't take it. but she was just being damn extra, and insisted on doing so. she ended up getting a roasting from shrub hahahahahahahah i thot that was so farnee cuz she actually came over to make peace but shrub was so mad she scolded that girl and told her to GET LOST!! *lol.

on hindsight, i think that was pretty rude *lol*. and i remember that i used to tell shrub she becomes rude when she drinks - i haven't seen that side come out in a while so i forgot all bout it. but it's really quite hilarious.  that roasting is one of those kodak moments... we'll have many more good laughs bout it *chuckle*  i lurve shrub to bits and i totally dig the times we party together. sistas rock!!

posted by: livingde8ddoll at February 19, 2005 11:27 | link | comments |

~ has anyone seen my zippo? ~

i am so upset that some fucker stole my fav zippo at the club last nite! like, what the hell is he gonna do with such a cool black JD zippo with the words DarkScarlette engraved on it?!? he certainly can't pass off as a darkscarlette duh. wat an A-HOLE! of all things he had to steal THAT zippo - my first ever most fav zippo that i carry everywhere, when i'm sad and go down to the pool to be alone and take a puff i take that zippo with me, when i'm going out to party i take that zippo with me, when i need to light up my belair lamp i use that zippo and it sleeps on the side table beside me when i sleep and i loved it so much cuz my shrub sista gave it to me last year for my birthday booooohoooooooooooooooooooooooooo

we went up the bar to dance and when we returned to the table of 'frens'... it was gone! did that jerk Max take it out of spite cuz we were rude to his coming-ons?!? shrub said it must be him cuz my zippo vanished when he left doh....

i said many times last nite the thief will rot in hell so i'm not gonna say it again today cuz it's bad to curse pple. but u noe what. i sure hope he burns his nostril hairs when he uses MY zippo to light up.

posted by: livingde8ddoll at February 19, 2005 10:53 | link | comments |

~ somewhere only i noe ~

 there's this place called personal hell, and that's where i live a lot of the time. i'm not permitted to ever leave this place bcuz i can't. i've committed myself. essentially i am the same girl but at the same time, i'm changed. the Chinese believe in palmistry, that your destiny literally lies in your hands, that the lines running across your palms form the map of your future. i guess my life is meant to be complex - take a look at the complicated lines mapping my palm and u'd see it. if i sliced off the entire piece of skin on my palm, would that erase all the obstacles and give me a simple life?

posted by: darkscarlette at February 18, 2005 14:28 | link | comments (2) |